We do some pretty serious research around here at CivicScience. Some of the smartest people in the world spend countless hours mulling over hundreds of millions of poll responses and near-infinite lines of code. Sometimes, especially after a massive code release like we had this week, when burn-out is near, things can get weird. Today was one of those days.
So this internal “meme” started flying around the office message board entitled: Poll Questions that Should Have “Only When I’m Drunk” as an Answer Option.
What followed was a drop in company-wide productivity that would make Henry Ford roll over in his grave. Keep in mind that over 39,000 unique question IDs exist in our database – that’s 39,000+ poll questions that have been written by us, by our web publisher partners, our clients, and our friends. And I swear “Only when I’m drunk” could be an answer option for nearly half of them. Here are a few favorites my compatriots discovered today:
Bacon and Pizza? Sure. If I was drunk.
And another easy one:
Surely a large portion of Uber and Lyft riders are drunk. That’s the point, right?
Guilty as charged…
Wiring money drunk is classy.
Nothing like seeing the sunrise when you’re loaded.
Drunk lobbying? Sure.
Trust me, the thought of this guy hammered while wearing Spanx is the funniest thing ever.
And finally, some days it’s truer than others…
Happy Weekend everyone. #OnlyWhenImDrunk